At university I once told a guy that NASA called to say that they had just spotted his ego from space, that's just how big his ego is. But then recent revelations made me think... perhaps he's not the only one with an ego in that conversation. I have an ego... A big one in fact. And so do you. (I ask you to hold your word slap till you finish reading this).
We all have an ego, because its the fundamental necessary evil that makes the world go round. Its necessary because it gives us a sense of self. It identifies itself as person with a name and gender and address and life story. You cannot exist in this world without your ego, because no matter much we feel a spiritual oneness with everyone and everything, you will still have your own body that limits you from truly becoming one with the world. You can't avoid it... I mean picture this... You're sitting at the dining table and the person opposite you as just used the salt on their food, and your food also needs more salt... No amount of oneness is gonna make your food saltier. YOU will have to ask the person across from YOU to pass the salt.
Essentially that is all the ego is at its basic level, but what it becomes is entirely up to how you identify yourself with. So no, being vain or modest has very little to do with having an "ego" about yourself. Perhaps studies will one day find that a healthy vanity may in fact be better than being modest. I say this because the vain have a healthy dose of love for themselves, and so they should... Everyone one should. But we all don't. Some of us have low self-esteems, eating disorders, lack confidence, and have issues with accepting achievements with grace. Jane Austin makes a good argument about this, in her book Pride and Prejudice... Actually, it was when I read the book a few years ago that I began to really look at the concept of modesty and its affect on the ego.
You see, learning to love yourself is one of the most important things that one can ever do. I mean you can hold yourself to the perception of what others think of you and be happy or unhappy, but you can also hold yourself to your ego's perception and be happy or unhappy... Everything the ego knows it has learnt. So if you believe that small button noses are nice but you have a straight pointy nose, it doesn't mean that you don't have a nice nose. Or does it? That depends entirely on you and your ego. I will discuss more on this later on when I discuss Taking Things Personally. What I am really trying to achieve here is an understanding on the fact that you are separate from your ego. You can tell this very easily like this: The next time you start thinking about things ask yourself, if I am talking then who is listening? More often than not, you are the one listening and the one talking is your ego.
One of my cousins always jokes that she can't decide which of the voices in her head should she listen to. She's right, there are a few voices happening in all of our heads. There's the ego, there is you and there is what Eckhart Tolle calls "The pain body". But also sometimes there's a quiet voice in the corner, nudging you on... it may be your gut or sixth sense, or instinct. However you look at it, most of the time that voice is coming from God, or the angels, maybe even a last loved one. So never ignore that voice. I mean you can if you want to... freedom of choice and all that jazz, but it might work out more pleasantly if you did listen.
So we all have an ego and its necessary thing to have, which can sometimes be a bad thing, because the ego affects the way you wield the Law of Attraction. If your ego is always looking to play the victim and you are so identified with your ego that you won't notice just how often you play the victim in your everyday life. The same goes for playing the judge. There are two ways to overpower your ego, sort of. Well, there is only one way that I know off, and the other way is more like a quick fix.
The quick fix way is to change your thoughts. You can think more positive thoughts and you can change your perceptions. This is good as a start because its like trimming down the bushy branches and leaves of an unwanted weed, so that you can eventually pull it out from the root. It will give you an difficult but, forgive the pun, fruitful start. It may take a few days but you will start seeing some definite improvements. But to achieve life long good results, the root must go, otherwise its just as easy to fall back into the same rut that you started off in. Trust me, I have first hand experience in this. It was difficult to climb out of it, but i did, and so can you, so no worries here.
To pull the root and to accomplish overpowering your ego, you must become present. This means you must be in the moment during the moment. That means the past is only a memory and the future only a possibility that only exists in your mind. So stop and focus completely on something right in front of you. It might be an object, it might be a body part... whatever it is, just focus on it. Your mind will eventually become still and you feel something like peace. You will find that the small bouts of peace can become an addictions and eventually all you will want to do is be present.
I'm not saying that you shouldn't remember your past, or that its not necessary to plan for the future. Those things are important. All I am saying is that you shouldn't only be stuck in the past and future to the point that you miss out of the fun of the present.
In part 2 of The EGO, I will be discussing the way the ego identifies itself with concepts, and how you can shape your ego to work for you not against you.
So I leave you will a quote that made an impact on me:
